One of the of the biggest secrets we strive to keep is a sense of self-governance and pride. The idea or feeling that you are crucial in some special way, that you are loved by a unique person, that someone is giving you unique attention, these are some of the ego’s very delicate secrets. We are striving to hide our Divine Self and are partaking in all these varied games, which appear to be very disturbing. It is rather depressing and it really doesn’t go anywhere, so we try to get scraps of special love, attention and recognition to prop ourselves up.
We toil so hard at turning into “superior people”, at obtaining greater intelligence and more skills. We want to be appreciated more and be more popular. The entire self-help industry is focused on improving the self so you can grow into a better you. That is another scheme we secretly engage on ourselves, thinking we have to keep turning our wheels trying to turn into better. This self-improvement game is another secret we can to learn to let go of. It is very soothing when you start to understand that you do not have to turn into any better than you already are. You were formed perfect. It is not through self-improvement that you find serenity but through self-acceptance.
As I engaged with A Course in Miracles, I could notice that there was a dread of divine love in my mind. I recognized this was the ego’s dread of losing itself. The ego is afraid of being uncovered and being perceived as a puff of nothingness. That is the dread of intimacy. We discuss about this terror in relationships, which is sometimes portrayed as fear of sexual intimacy, but it is really a fear of dropping our persona, our mask of uniqueness. It is the fear of getting swept away by a magnificent love, a love so intense that none of us can even imagine something as magnificent and powerful!
For me, those are the big secrets, because it doesn’t start off with this great consciousness. It always starts with feeling like you have done something inappropriate, whether you’ve masturbated, stolen something, malhandled an individual, or there is something in your mind that you have deemed as so hideous that you don’t even want to meet it, you just want to forget about it and push it out of consciousness.
Beneath all those reminiscences and thoughts, is the belief that we are divided. This is the “secret” we hide. It really is an unfeasible belief, but we think that it is true; We have considered it as terrible and have pushed it out of awareness. All unconscious guilt comes from this belief in division. And as you really offer yourself over to the miracle, you feel all those hidden beliefs and secrets are being washed away and you finally face this hidden belief in separation!
Please, share any thoughts and remarks with me below, I’d adore to hear about your encounter!
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